Our Mind Whitewashes

I found David DeSteno’s talk fascinating, as you can see from my notes.

02:56 – Trust makes us vulnerable
04:06 – One of best predictors of academic success how much they trust teacher
04:22 – Trust smooths out romance bumps in ways below conscious thought
04:59 – If you feel elevated sense of power becomes harder to stay trustworthy
06:01 – Moral behaviour is contextual and situational
07:05 – The mind balances short term benefits and long term costs in the moment
08:02 – Anyone can be untrustworthy, even you
10:05 – In one experiment, 90% of participants cheat
10:50 – Cheaters then rank themselves as trustworthy while condemning the same behaviour in others
11:45 – We use rationalizations to whitewash our own choices because we need to trust ourselves.
17:30 – Being trustworthy & showing that is not always useful
18:25 – Trust integrity, Trust competence
24:20 – Minds use body language cues without concious awareness
31:45 – Trustability & compassion can change rapidly and dramatically.
33:15 – How do we identify who is worthy of help?
33:30 – Compassion Fatigue
34:15 – Similarity as measure of worth.  Assumed reciprocity.
35:30 – Motor Synchrony
37:00 – Intuitive Similarity, then rationalized
37:40 – 3X difference in willingness to assist
38:40 – Compassion & Trustworthiness are flexible
39:20 – Retraining mind to find similarities will increase trust & compassion
40:20 – Make goal seem more joined
41:00 – Mindfulness
41:15 – 3x more meditators helped someone in need
44:50 – Mindfulness demands Equanimity.  Similarity, connection, category break down.
46:00 – Best predictor of resilience?   Trust.
46:45 – Empower better trust
49:50 – In the long run, trustworthy people profit most.
53:45 – Inherent trust erases suspicion and doubt, smoothing bumps, avoiding “death spiral”


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