It’s solstice, and I am feeling the need to party.
I need to get loose, get open, get down, get human.
I want to get pretty, get shiny, have a drink, a dance, a smile and maybe even a kiss.
It’s just that I see very little point or possibility in doing these things well alone.
My sister came over the other night. She watched two movies and I fed her. She told me it was a real treat for someone working huge hours in big retail at Christmas.
She wasn’t ready to party. She wasn’t ready to reflect loose and free energy, wasn’t ready to create safe space to just let the tightness go and let the energy flow.
I don’t come from a family where parties happened. There was no loose, laughing time, no drink and a dance time, no flirting and frivolous time. The banquet wasn’t for feasting, it was for getting through.
When social occasions demand more tightening up, more discipline, more being appropriate than less, well, they aren’t really parties, are they?
A party dress, some sparkle, a lovely libation, a few tasty goodies and someone friendly to connect with on a long, dark lonely night. They are simple human needs.
I have spent many Saturday nights in my life getting dressed for parties that never came. I spent time searching for them, but they were always, always few and far between, and almost never safe enough for me to get loose.
The release of a party, safe, warm, hot human space to get loose, has always been a human needs. We need our breaks, our rituals, our nakedness (1998), our connection.
I feel the need to party on this long, dark night.
That’s not something that I can do alone.
But, sadly, it has never been shown that is something I am safe to do with others, either.
May you have some sparkle and magic on this longest of nights.