First, society works hard to break transpeople, by stigmatizing them, by shaming them, by forcing them into hiding, by demanding they lie about who they are one way or the other, but putting their desire into the perverted and abnormal category, by denying them mirroring, and so much more.
Then, they prove that transpeople are broken by pointing out how they lie, act apart from social norms, are immature, cracked and sick.
This cycle of doing as much as possible to break transpeople and then proving that they deserve what they get because they are all broken has been used to justify trans marginalization for centuries.
The best thing you could do for kids who exposed transgender “tendencies” was to break them. Transpeople are broken, so if we love them, we have to break them of their transgender proclivities so they can be happy and normative. We work to break them because it is the kindest thing we can do for them.
Every transperson has had the experience of having someone they love point to a broken transperson — one who looks odd or disconnected from social expectations, one who has done something rude or even criminal — and say “Thank God I don’t have to deal with that kind of freak.”
Sometimes we can just stay silent, internalize the fear, add to our shame, and strengthen our own crippling self policing.
When we are out, though, we have say something. Do we pile on, separating ourselves from them by claiming that we are a good tranny by saying “Yes! That is disgusting! Those people should be cleansed?”
Or do we offer some kind of explanation, a context, a reason for compassion?
The cycle of justifying any attempt to break transpeople by claiming that visible transpeople are all broken is twisted and sick logic on the part of those who perpetuate such abuse.
Sadly, this often includes transpeople who dehumanize other transpeople just to try and gain standing with the normies. These collaborators don’t see themselves as broken, just as good trannys who hate challenging and disgusting queers like any normal person should.
I have seen many transpeople make choices that come from their brokenness. These choices are ugly and even sometimes illegal.
What I haven’t seen is much attempt to help them recover from the cycle of breaking that they were subject to from a very young age. I don’t see them supported in finding ways to be trans, mature and healthy.
And that means the broken cycle just keeps on crushing us, as brokenness justifies breaking and breaking creates brokenness.
It just breaks my heart.