“It’s you, you know,” the bartender told TBB this Saturday night at her favourite chophouse.
“This connection wouldn’t have happened without you. You are the reason everyone is feeling loose and sexy tonight. You are amazing!”
There is something magical about someone who has made peace with their own desires, learning to show their heart on the outside. When you are comfortable in your own skin, not very bothered about what other people think and trusting your own Eros, people can feel it.
That doesn’t mean that they are always comfortable with it, especially at first, as the two older Southern Belles who joined TBB at the bar for dinner gave her the fisheye, putting their heads together to chatter, proved.
The restaurant is safe, though, with a gracious owner so TBB ignored them, just chatting with a bartender who remembers good guests and makes a fine Negroni. This is a classy place and they know how to make people feel comfortable.
It was when the trio of young, well-heeled swingers came in that things began to get interesting. The gent peeled off to enjoy his evening, but the two thirty something women picked out TBB from across the room and bracketed her at the bar, one cocky and one tender.
As dinner came out, there was laughter and sharing, of stories and of erotic exposures stored on their phones between the girls at the bar. TBB was the catalyst for their relaxing and the gals went off to find prey for the night.
“I held court,” TBB told me.
A bit of magic had already happened, though. Those curious belles had seen TBB chatting with the hot gals, learning that she was not only fun, she was also safe. Soon they too were sharing with her, relaxing into the evening, and telling stories about desire. Heck, they might have even invited TBB to join them if she still had the equipment they favoured in place.
TBB even knew how to play cupid, though, telling the bartender that the hot swinger found him very attractive. If he just asked, he might have some company tonight.
That bartender had seen the magic that TBB and her strong comfortable Eros brought to the bar that night, affirming how her transformational energy had changed people around her.
“The stars aligned when I decided to get out of my engineer outfit and put on boots, a skirt and show some cleavage.” she told me. “I know I’m in my fifties, but if you just show people you aren’t a threat, aren’t competing with them, they open themselves up to you in really beautiful ways.”
A few drinks and the big, open, vulnerable heart of a visibly transgender woman at the bar offered a glamour on that chilly Saturday night that no one was expecting.
“I don’t think the other gals actually saw me as a woman, which was sad” she said, “but I know that they saw me as a magical individual, saw me on the girls side.” They saw her as bold enough and strong enough, to stand up to social pressure, not subject to the judgment and fear of other woman like they are, saw her as not bleeding to stay in the system of desire, unlike them.
After 4 AM, when she drove home the horny high-maintenance blonde who needed lots of affirmation, even calling a boyfriend in the night, things changed.
A guy staying at the house invited TBB inside and made some coffee. They chatted, connecting not just over curiosity and transcendence, but over humanity. They spoke of the men and the women that he had loved, and he even shed tears over a lost child the mother chose not to take to term.
TBB sat together with him, two grown ups bonding over being queer and being the parent. TBB was finally not just the transcendent queen who smashed the ice for others, not just a subject of curiosity and awe, but a human sitting together in empathy with another tender heart. At that moment, she let go of her shield of playful desire and entered a deeper intimacy that left her moved, touched and wanting more.
She got a text message the next day from the tender woman, the gal who struggled with her own emotional state.
“God put you there for me,” she said. “Months ago I prayed for a transwoman to teach me how to be a woman.”
TBB, the Goddess Of Eros, wove her spell over those people, creating an energy that opened hearts.
More than that, after the party, someone who saw her as a tender woman, opening up so they could share hearts together.
All the points of light came together on Saturday night, her huge heart creating a nirvana experience for TBB and the people around her. She made magic, opening doors for others, and finally letting the door be opened for her.
It’s just what she does.
Callan 