every morning i wake up and wonder

what life do i have to deny today?

what pain do i have to sumblimate today?

what tears do i have to swallow today?

what dreams do i have to sacrifice today?

what devaluing do i have to incur today?

what beauty do i have to sequester today?

what frustration do i have to stifle today?

what songs do i have to silence today?

what possibilities do i have to put down today?

what hopes do i have to shatter today?

what suffering do i have to endure today?

what abuse do i have to absorb today?

what ignorance do i have to brook today?

what new cheek do i have to turn today?

what love do i have to incerate today?

what invisibility do i have to tolerate today?

what disrespect do i have to let pass today?

what joy do i have to poision today?

what myopia do i have to countenance today?

what fear do i have to withstand today?

what acting out do i have to stomach today?

what judgements do i have to weather today?

what of myself do i have to destroy today?

i don’t know how to
both be small
and be big

and those who want change from me
are also clear
they want me to stay small and serve
following the way
they deny daily.

but my context never changes
the coal face is right here
and it is killing me today.

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