Such A Girl

TBB is such a girl.

She went to her boss to vent about a co-worker.  He’s asked her not to do that; doesn’t really want to get involved.  He  said he would talk to the guy if she wanted, but was relieved when she didn’t ask him to.   It was so hard she wanted to cry, but she didn’t, of course.

TBB just knows he shouldn’t need to be asked, that he should address personnel problems as a matter of course.  But he is much more comfortable with technical problems.

He assured TBB that she was a very good engineer and she was doing a very, very good job, and not to worry about that.

TBB, well, she just melted.  A few words of praise and she was better.

And later, when they went to the bar, people told her that she cleaned up real nice, looking much better than the oil-stained wretch who keeps things running in the engine room.

TBB, well, she just melted.  A few words of praise and she was better.

I have never thought trans was about the freedom to wear different clothes.

I have always throught that trans was about expressing what you knew to be true about yourself.

And the past years of struggle should tell everyone that TBB knows herself to be a girl.

What does that mean?  It means that she knows she thinks and feels more like a girl, that she loves the things that women love, and that she responds to the world more like a woman than like a man.

There are more and more places where they are experimenting with sex segregation in the classroom, understanding that boys and girls tend to respond to different kinds of engagement and motivation.

That separation, though, while it might be coded as sex, to me is about nature.

Sure, we separate kids by reproductive biology to talk about reproductive biology, what to do with and about your genitals.

But social connections are about nature, not about simple binary organ counting.

I know that I was never, ever one of the boys.    Gym class was hell for me, because there manhood was enacted and I didn’t have the goods to measure up.

Transwomen often learn to hold back, not to enter their own feminine nature.  That doesn’t mean that we don’t have it, and don’t come to life when it is engaged.

TBB is such a girl, no matter how big or professional she is.  For her, that doesn’t mean being one of the girls; that is an experience she was denied.

But when she goes through all to express her femininity, it doesn’t just mean she wants to be a crossdresser.

It means she knows who she is, and she is trying to tell you, even if you can’t hear over your own expectations of her history & biology.

But treat her like a woman and she will smile.

She’s just such a girl.