We live a half-assed life, most of us.
We are in contingency plans all the time, scraping it out, knowing that enough is enough, and great is way too much to aspire to. Good is acceptable and fine is sufficient, and we can even live with just OK if we have to.
This is a fast paced, crazy world that demands we take the pressure, speeding up and stretching thinner just to stay in place. We have lost relationship with the seasons, with nature, with our neighbors and even with the beat of our own heart. We respond rather than react, jump rather than walk, pant rather than breathe.
Over time, speed and vibration are very hard on the human soul, very hard on our precious nature.
This is why, I think, that the thing we dream for most in the darkness and cold of winter, is that somehow, with some magic, though some miracle, we will have a full-assed holiday. We want a holiday where we can be fully present, sharing quality with those we love, the hand-made, the special, the love.
When people drool over images of perfect Christmas, they are, I suggest, thinking not about stretching themselves to do everything they see and more, rather they are thinking about what it might be like to have a time where the goal is perfection, selfless creation where we work with the creator to make times where people can feel safe not in the multitude of expectations society lays on them in every moment, but safe in knowing that when they bring the best of themselves, the best they can do with the gifts they were given, they bring delight, joy and the ability to be loved for who they are.
There is a reason that parents quell over gifts made by tiny hands, because they see in those gifts enthusiasm, exuberance, commitment and love. That is a kind of perfection that we understand as humans, not the low tolerance perfection of the machine made, but the handmade perfection that comes from a heart that is perfect in this moment, now. Wouldn’t it be great if we could see that perfection in every bit of our holiday, from the decorations hung so carefully to the dinner laid before us, to the words of time out of time, of love and energy that we share?
As modern, post-industrial humans caught in the woosh of culture, what we seem to crave most is what we feel we have lost: the connection, presence and humanity of coming together as community where each is valued. We want to come home, that perfect home, a home where we are known, understood, seen and valued, where we are cared for, pampered and just relaxed.
We want to be in the place where people are present for us and we are present for them. We want a place where we can stop being split up, defended, shattered and torn.
That’s what I wish for you, this holiday season. That you have a full-assed holiday, where, even if just for a moment, you feel like you are really there, really present with people who are really present for you.
Harder than it seems, I know.
But ass-fully-in, well, it’s still something to be sought this season, and for that matter, the year around.