OhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDie
my sister's sump pump diddn't turn on right. she told the old man, and the old man wants to tell me he doesn't want to hear any crap, it just has to work.
he likes to pretend he is having conversations when he is just telling you what he believes.
i smile and divert and take the hits because i know it's about him, how he can't master things like he did.
but no matter how i cure it, he can't see when it's getting to be too much for me because it's his stuff. his stuff, my bruises
and then i crack and hit myself, hard, in the head, this stupid betraying head that can't slice me fine enough, can't keep me dead enough.
OhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDie
and then i pull it together and go to offer him a solution
but he needs to go back and tell me what's wrong again, how i am wrong again
OhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDie
my mother has spoken. she doesn't want to hear anymore about the sump pump issue. i can choke on my own pain, for all she cares. yeah, I know. that's just the way things are, and the way things always have been. when I get a boo-boo, i'm just not supposed to make any mess. she has her own issues to worry about.
and i have no one to care for me, to be there. so i chant out
OhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDie
and i mean it, i mean it. i need to be more dead, and now
OhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDie
OhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDieOhPleaseGodHelpMeDie
OhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDieOhDearGodPleaseHelpMeDie