Could you walk the catwalk? Could you get up there and look fierce under the hot lights in a flashy outfit, every eye on the place scanning for any flaw or failure? Could you take the pressure, the scrutiny, the judgement?
If you can do that, could you do it alone, putting together your own outfit, your own hair & makeup, without the help of designers, stylists, artists, hair people and other models to lift the attitude & break the ice? Could you get out there and strut your stuff alone in front of that crowd?
Going out alone into a world of scrutiny & judgement is how it often feels to be the only tranny in the room. You may want to blend in, but you know that at some point, you will stick out, and in that moment people will see you as a performer on a stage rather than just another person.
You can try to hide the parts you don’t want people to see, but that’s a recipe for failure. The moment they actually see and respond to those parts, you have failed.
No, the only choice, the only choice to walk in the world as a tranny is to have the same thing all those models have — atttiude.
People have used lots of words to describe the attitude of those runway models. Haughty, pouty, fierce, intense, separate, whatever. Most of it comes down, though, to “fuck you.” “I look fucking hot and everyone wants me, so I own this stage the way I own your ‘nads right now. You want what I am wearing, you want me, you want to be me, you want to own this beauty in your life.”
It’s not so easy, though, to always have to be that kind of on in the real world, without a crew of dozens making a space for you to be that hot.
To walk in the world as a tranny requires attitude, and it is the one we pick that defines how hot we are.
Problem is that every attiude requires some level of “I’m hot and I know it,” confidence, some kind of “Fuck you, because whatever you think, I know I am potent.”
How we do that without becoming to separate, or worse, too silly, where there’s your dogfight right there.